Sexy or Hot?

There’s a certain je ne sais quoi to sexiness, a certain something that’s difficult to pin down and quantify – some girls have it and some girls don’t – some 9-10’s have it, some don’t. It’s a big mind fuck to get the “I want to fuck that girl senseless” with a 7 and not getting that with a 9. It can really mess with a dudes head. Perhaps I’m alone with this, I don’t know.

Now there’s important note here, we’re talking about sexiness and an 8, 9, or 10 trumps any 6 or 7 no matter what she does to us biologically. That being said, there are times I’m with a hot babe, that doesn’t rev my engine as much as a past 7 that makes me wish I was with the 7 for a few hours of porntastic sexual glee. A sexy girl can make you crave her like shooting heroin. A hot girl with limited sexiness makes you feel like a king in all areas, but I personally find them easier to game, and thus that sexy charge lacks.

See being under the spell of a sexy chick makes your testosterone shoot through the roof creating a desire that can rival oneitis – it can be so addicting that all you can think about is banging her – no matter how hard you try, every urge gets amplified. Only in relieving this tension, by banging her can you find momentary peace. But the desire alone can mess up your game.

On the whole, it’s much better to hook up (at least for a long term relationship) with a girl that doesn’t make you lust her every minute of being around her, as you can maintain more control, even though the sex will be less explosive and earth shattering.

When talking about a man selling his wild oats, this is what we mean. Getting enough of these sexy nymphs out of your system so you can enjoy a life raising a family with out the overt craving for the drug of the sexy chick.

Of course that caveat is for most men, with limited knowledge of game, and you can game these sexy nymphs the same way as just the hot chick; by learning how to mimic your actions with the non-sexy hot babe, with the sexy hot babe. After many successful applications, you will see this sexual dilemma disappear, and no chick manages to get you under her spell.

The downside to this, you lose the ability for mind blowing sex, or you still have the desire and keep seeking it out like an elusive white whale, never to satiate that jonesing that courses through your system. You find yourself chasing the dragon, in a never ending loop.

There are always consequences to our actions, and as much as game is important to development of men, there is also something greater that we can do, game is only the beginning of the journey, it’s the sword and shield given to you to traverse the underworld.

10 thoughts on “Sexy or Hot?

  1. I know what you mean. Sometimes I will be more turned on by the objectively less attractive friend of a stunner. It’s probably pheromones or something. I just let my dick lead the way when that happens and go for the one I’m more attracted to.

  2. Gents, isn’t being turned on by the “objectively less attractive friend” really just a version of “female game”. By your definitions, which I agree with, the less objectively attractive person is pushing the right buttons, giving the right subtle social cues, so that you react to her more than you would based on her looks alone. While some are naturals at this, not actually needing to try, I have observed that many more females are picking up on how to fake it at a very superficial level (enough to interest you at the perfunctory-socializing level of a bar or a club… as long as they don’t talk much). Thoughts?

  3. Your third paragraph definitely talks about girls that (after retrospective analysis) trigger the buttons for femininity and fertility. A shine in the skin, tightness in the body (not to be confused with thinness or skinniness. More like, good amounts of meat in the right places, but tight meat), and aura of innocence.. etc. With these girls the feeling is a craving in the groin, and urge to go up there and bang her senseless. There is no thinking, no logic. Just, bang. Badabam, badabum.

    I don’t care if these traits are natural or learned. They are so rare that I let my groins do the talking.

    So for me, if a 7 gives me that urge, but a nine does not, than the 7 is my nine, and the nine is my seven.

    In this light, nothing drops a woman faster in the scale than slutty clothing, smug face, plucked-drawn eyebrows, extensive make up etc.

  4. Finndistan, I agree with most of your characterization about femininity and fertility… shine in the skin, tight meat, and the aura of innocence (some talk about stunning “eyes” or voluptuous lips). Setting aside your final sentence about slutty clothing and extensive make-up – over-the-top “trying” – I hope that we all realize that A LOT of the things we described as being instantly desirable ARE fake. Most women over the age of 22 don’t have shine in the skin and wrinkle-free complexion without makeup. Most of what comes off as attractive is carefully applied concealer, mascara, etc. Just google “celebrities without makeup” and pick your favorite innocent/radiant woman… Few if any of them look that way without some help. So Donlak was writing about how many of us men feel the drawn to “sexy” vs. “hot”, and I’m wondering if it bothers anyone that we are so easily gamed ourselves. We can have a perfectly hot woman, maybe even a long-term relationship (so one would presume that the hot woman has other appealing qualities too), and yet we have a constant craving for being gamed by the 6-7 who pushes buttons like a 10, in a superficial way. Hey, I’m guilty. I can objectively tell myself whatever I want, but I still react. “After many successful applications, you will see this sexual dilemma disappear, and no chick manages to get you under her spell.” Donlak seems to think that we don’t HAVE to stay under this spell. I will tell you that I must be a black hole for it, because I haven’t gotten tired of it yet… It still pushes my buttons… But as time goes on, pleasurable as it is to slum it and work off aggression and old issues by giving in to temporary hypnosis by the woman who is less-than, I’m less and less pleased at being played as opposed to being the one doing the playing. My instincts are like a dog that I’m trying to teach discipline to, only he keeps trying to mount the neighbor’s wife. I WANT to be shooting for quality over quantity and not having to scratch every itch, but… there goes another push-up bra… I know things won’t look as good when that comes off, but… oh what the hell…

  5. Hey, Donlak… How much of this “spell” is that the sexy chick is actually TRYING vs. the hot chick that is often used to male attention, expects it, and cultivates a certain level of aloofness/indifference? I had a woman at work who was about a 7 come in wearing a too-short skirt one morning. She walked into my office, smiled, dropped a note on the desk, turned around, and just walked out. The note said, “This skirt is for you.” Now I KNEW she was a 7, but I wanted to jump her so much just for making the effort, for doing the thing that some other 9-10 wouldn’t do. She did a few things like that to get me going, and in the back of my mind, I kept saying, “Why are you even paying attention? She’s not at the level of the other things you’ve got going on.” Hell, maybe it’s the male ego. We like it when someone wants us, and is actively doing something about it, so as long as they exceed a certain threshold in the looks department, they can push our buttons. Below the threshold – stalker. Above the threshold – optional f;ck puppet.

  6. Some girls are acutely aware and some act on instinct, we call these girls teases. It’s the teasing that makes us what to bang them so hard. I don’t necessarily mean cock teases, I mean a girl who knows how to ramp up sexual attraction by teasing.

  7. You are SPOT ON. One of the sexiest girls I’ve ever hooked up with is objectively a 6.5. I don’t know what it is about her, but she drives me absolutely insane. I’ve hooked up with 9+ quality girls who don’t do anything near what this girl does for me.

  8. I think you guys mean women with an incredible command of body language. They know that what turns men (and women) on is the feeling that they are desired – pretty much first and foremost. They know how to throw it out there without being overly obvious and picks up the slightest indication that you may be open to it. If not, it stops completely and you would have been none the wiser. Once it is out there, they know how to turn it up a notch before pulling back before it falls outside of their control (ie before it becomes too obvious to the point that you are “forced” to make a move and the game ends). Yes, believe it or not I had a guy do this to me. I knew what was happening (having knowledge of body language) but couldn’t help but be hooked. He wasn’t convetionally good looking – OK in an offbeat way – but boy did he mess with my head big time and got me all obsessed with him.

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