On my last post I requested what you, my readers used as their strategies in order to break it off with a nice sweet, and innocent girl. The caveat being that you don’t really want to hurt her, so you want it to go as smoothly as possible, with out any ancillary heart break on her end – also I’m assuming that you cold hearted bastards wouldn’t be heart broken – but am I wrong? Only somewhat. The original twitter conversation had Gmac stating that he still doesn’t enjoy it when he has to break it off with a sweet nice girl, I gave the standard reply the manosphere would give in order for him to be okay with her being hurt – somehow this got diluted into thinking that I was telling him ways to make him enjoy hurting a nice girl, which is not the case. You have to be pretty sociopathic to not care about anything that much. No, my point was that you can break up with a girl with out feeling bad, or guilty, which is essentially what we’re dealing with when someone says I don’t enjoy it. I don’t think anyone expects anyone to enjoy breaking up with someone – even girls don’t enjoy, even the cold ones – they usually feel bad for breaking a man’s heart – it’s not something they can usually stomach – it’s a good thing they have hard working and energetic hamsters to spin so they don’t have to deal with the guilt. We as men have less virile rodents in our wheels.
There was some good strategies laid forth by the faithful readers here, I will not be here to rank their effectiveness, as with all things in game, each strategy is suited for the individual, you can be presented with strategies and pick what you think will work best for you, but no one thing will work without your personality jiving with it. Game like all con’s has to have your complete buy in for it to work – the same with the break up or kiss off. You must have complete buy in – or there will be heart ache, and drama. For example, my favorite comment brought to you by Ashur:
Typically, I fake my own death.
This triggers the man-replacement algorithm in the female. They really don’t mind losing a man, as long as it not to another woman.
All joking aside, this is the essence of what you want to do in order to let the girl down easy, to ease your guilt – oh I don’t mean actually going through all the trouble to fake your death, as glorious as that sounds – secretly I’ve always wanted to do it – just keep going from different city to different city, racking up notches like a true ghost, my name but just a whisper in the wind. But I digress, the man-replacement algorithm is the key to save preciouses little heart. Once a girl has negated you as a prospect or an interest, there is no feelings for you – I’m sure many of you are aware of how a once loving woman can turn on a hair, and seem like a robot with it’s mind wiped of all previous bonds and events with the two of you, and cause you to feel less than worth-less. I still find it strange why any man would actually feel bad about hurting a girls feelings when they know those feelings are only fleeting and because of how you make her feel in this moment – being in a relationship with a girl is ensuring that you are constantly on the positive and sexually piquing side of her feelings – fall too far into sappy betaville and you slip right out of her consciousness completely. Any one that’s loved and lost a girl knows this to be true.
Unfortunately, most of us do feel something when we’re about to break it off, or are breaking it off with a girl, and I would probably be worried if you didn’t. However this isn’t actually caring about her. Not one bit. Human’s have this amazing feeling called empathy – girls are full of it and feel it all the time – it’s why they cry at sappy commercials and anything that shows any sentimentality. When you are feeling bad about breaking up with a girl, you are not caring about her, you just feel guilty – this is your conscious, and it’s a good thing to follow it, because what it does is projects your own feelings on to someone else, and helps prevent you from being to harsh, mean, and harming others. It’s what civilized people do. There is one caveat here though, when dealing with women. And that is – a man’s pain and a women’s pain are two totally different things when it comes to love. A man, even if he thinks his wife’s a cunt and a stupid bitch, if they break up, he’ll still remember and focus on any good times they had – he’ll still be crushed completely and sometimes never get back into the dating pool – often times this does not lead him to game blogs, and he slips away into nothingness. A woman, can be distraught, suicidal, sick, go into mental institutions, etc… however… and this is a BIG however, only if she still cares. She will only be hurt if she tingles for you. If she doesn’t, then you don’t ever have to worry about breaking up with her, you do not ever have to feel bad for it – because she doesn’t give a shit. Men project their own feelings on women, we do it all the time, and this blinds us in when we interact with women – our brain still relies on what we know, and what we know is us, men, how we think, feel, emote. Even players. In fact game exists primarily because of this one and only reason – you have to remind yourself not to think like a man, and do and act what a girls likes, finds attractive – understanding that, allows you to pluck all the right strings in order to make her sing. When we forget this, even experienced men, is because we forget that they are different than us – and that your guilt and empathy aren’t actually necessary. Well, unless your lazy.
You should feel bad when breaking up with a nice sweet girl if you make her tingle, and allow her to have thoughts of commitment with you, or she looks up to you, adores you, etc. If she is actually falling for you hard, and you just decide to rip her heart out and stomp on it – then yes you certainly feel like an ass. Remember the old mantra of the Lothario’s from the past? Always leave them better than you found them? That’s what this means.
Acting beta in order for her to lose attraction for you is certainly one way to do this, however it takes too long, and requires you to be in that sappy loser mindset too much, that is dangerous, your subconscious can be tricked by such behavior if you do it too long and too much. So not advised, unless you are in a significant long term relationship you want out of. For quick ones, it will work, but it can be messy, especially if you all travel in the same social circles. Again, it is effective though.
Being direct can be effective, but only if she’s still on the fence about you, use at your own risk, it could spark crazy escapades and slashed tires.
Going ghost can work, if you like to be hounded by text messages and phone calls and like to be stalked – again effective if she is on the fence – if she really likes you, this will crush her, and ruin her confidence in the near future.
The only way that I have found in my experience is the fake your own death move. Again not literally, and somewhat like acting beta, and somewhat like going ghost – this maneuver is a blend of all these into a cohesive undeniable splitting from a girl without drama and without tears. At least on her end, I can’t speak for you people.
How it’s done: Take everything that the two of you bonded over, including sex, with her – and start acting disinterested in it. Start to talk to her less often, and do not initiate anything. You can start to text or give one word answers – this will prompt a “Is something wrong?” question, which you want to actually down play. Say you two bonded over music, she invites you to a concert – you want to disengage from this mutual enjoyment, reject it, but offer something else to do that you know she isn’t into (if you don’t know, hope.). For instance.
You: Hmmmnn…you know, I didn’t want to tell you this, but I don’t really like BLANK music – I know you do but – hey you want to watch Alcatraz?
If it’s really early in the relationship, this is quite easy to do – it’s basically just anti-game – game teaches you to be interesting, anti-game is don’t be interesting – show little to no ambition – if she asked what you did last night, just say nothing… watched some tv. Most of the time you don’t have to wait too long for her to actually initiate the break up. In fact she’ll most likely just stop calling. And presto, you’ve broken it off with her, and spared her feelings.
This method is good for any moderate term relationship… I’d say two month minimum, and really, if your worried about hurting a girls feelings that you haven’t actually been dating for two months, give you’re head a shake prince charming.