High Maintenance Girls

Sometimes illustrations provide a deeper understanding than some of my longwinded prosody that I normally bestow upon you, the loyal readers and adapts of game. So I will paint an illustration for you one more time. Difference between men and girls can be summed up with this conversation between a guy and a female acquaintance.

Josie: Are you and Suzie still seeing each other?

Adam: No I broke it off with her.

Josie: What? Why she was pretty?

Adam: She was way too high maintenance.

Josie: She doesn’t look high maintenance.

Adam: What do you mean?

Josie: She doesn’t look like the type that always wants new jewelry and presents.

Adam: What are you talking about?

Josie: She dresses okay, but she didnt seem to be the type care about that stuff. I think you should reconsider.

Adam: High maintenance doesn’t have anything to do with materialism.

Josie: What? Yes it does.

Adam: No. It doesn’t.

Josie: You’re too picky.

You may have had similar conversations with girls, some of you might have even tried to explain reality to them, but they simply see the world different then we do. To them high maintenance means an expensive girl friend. To us, it means bat shit crazy, a girl who tries to change us, has a 51 point check list of expectations of you and how you should behave, a girl that constantly tests you, and frankly a girl that requires constant gaming. That’s high maintenance.

Ladies, if you’re reading this, being low maintenance means chilling the f out. Relax. Enjoy life. Be sweet, kind, pretty and fun. We don’t want to be included in drama about frivolous things, and every mundane “event” that happens in your life – oh and let us be men.

We are simple creatures, let us enjoy our time with you. If you want to bitch and complain about us, hang with your girl friends, cuz we don’t want to hear it. Besides, there’s a hotter sweeter girl over there, and she’s sending me the sex eyes. Remember why a man is with you. It’s not because you’re a special little snow flake. It’s because we want to bang you, multiple times, and we enjoy you when you’re happy and sweet.

If only girls would understand.

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